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  <body-html>&lt;p&gt;Garfunkel: &amp;#8220;Where have you gone, Joe DiMaggio?&amp;#8221;&lt;/p&gt;


	&lt;p&gt;(He delivers a devastating open-palm strike through a brick wall. Joe DiMaggio, terrified, hides behind a rusty filing cabinet. He tries not to breathe. He has never been so scared.)&lt;/p&gt;


	&lt;p&gt;Garfunkel: &amp;#8220;Our nation turns its lonely eyes to you.&amp;#8221;&lt;/p&gt;


	&lt;p&gt;(A single bead of sweat falls from DiMaggio&amp;#8217;s cheek &#8212; or is it a tear? Regardless, it cascades to the ground with an audible splash. Garfunkel&amp;#8217;s head darts toward him, and suddenly the filing cabinet is airborne. Garfunkel&amp;#8217;s legs are a blur of roundhouse kicks. This is it.)&lt;/p&gt;


	&lt;p&gt;&lt;i&gt;Cross the bridge over troubled water in this 100% combed cotton, sweatshop-free, amazingly comfy black American Apparel t-shirt. They fit a little snug and also shrink almost a whole size in the first wash. So if you&#8217;re on the fence, order the bigger size.&lt;/i&gt;&lt;/p&gt;</body-html>
  <created-at type="datetime">2009-01-07T23:07:33-08:00</created-at>
  <handle>martial-art-garfunkel</handle>
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  <published-at type="datetime">2009-01-07T23:07:33-08:00</published-at>
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  <title>Martial Art Garfunkel Shirt</title>
  <updated-at type="datetime">2009-01-08T14:56:44-08:00</updated-at>
  <vendor>Big Stone Head</vendor>
  <tags>garfunkel, geekery, ninja</tags>
  <body>Garfunkel: &quot;Where have you gone, Joe DiMaggio?&quot;

(He delivers a devastating open-palm strike through a brick wall. Joe DiMaggio, terrified, hides behind a rusty filing cabinet. He tries not to breathe. He has never been so scared.)

Garfunkel: &quot;Our nation turns its lonely eyes to you.&quot;

(A single bead of sweat falls from DiMaggio's cheek &#8212; or is it a tear? Regardless, it cascades to the ground with an audible splash. Garfunkel's head darts toward him, and suddenly the filing cabinet is airborne. Garfunkel's legs are a blur of roundhouse kicks. This is it.)

&lt;i&gt;Cross the bridge over troubled water in this 100% combed cotton, sweatshop-free, amazingly comfy black American Apparel t-shirt. They fit a little snug and also shrink almost a whole size in the first wash. So if you&#8217;re on the fence, order the bigger size.&lt;/i&gt;</body>
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